Dinner again?!?

So, when we last left off, I was actually managing to get dinner together, but it still confused me. Narrowing down what we were trying to do (come up with plan, make it healthy and on sale if possible) made it a lot easier.

On Sundays during lunch, we would look at the sales fliers, clip some coupons and then talk about what we wanted to eat. I pass the flier over to Mark, he looks at it, says "Oh, ____ is on sale, what about _____?" (For some reason, only I get ridiculously stressed out/confused over meals).

Once we plan the weeks dinners (throwing in a few ideas for lunch and breakfast for extra credit on occasion), I make a grocery list. One of the things we had to tweak was when to plan for...I prefer to grocery shop during the week (on my way home from work--or at least I did when I was at the Old School). So I have to promise to shop on Monday, when I already work late because the Recycling Club meeting is that day. Ugh. So we are trying Wednesday to Wednesday with moderate success.

I think the big thing that has really helped us is making a shared calendar in Google for meals (I know. This whole thing is ridiculous, and it feels even more absurd writing it out. It's nice of Mark to humor me, no?). We spent maybe 20 minutes going through and putting meals on Mondays, Thursdays and Saturdays (over planning doesn't go well--we don't know what will come up, and then we shop for--and waste---food for meals we don't end up eating). We filled in the whole month either with favorites we already know or a quick perusal of magazine recipes I'd clipped (I love cooking magazines). Now we can just check in and say, "Still good with x, y and z?" and change one if we want.

It's also finally gotten us to try some of the things we thought sounded good, but never do because we always revert to something we already know, like the Scallop Risotto we made for Valentines Day.

Hopefully this will keep for working for us me. Mark was volunteering at church on Sunday, and I was supposed to figure out dinner. He told me to make whatever. And I worked myself up and could not figure out what to make. I spent twenty minutes walking from my computer in the living room into the kitchen to look in the fridge, then pull my recipe file, then look stuff up on the computer. I almost called Mark. And then I reminded myself it was just dinner.

How do you get dinner on the table? Do you find it to be way harder than you thought it would be?

Dinner time, Part I

I started this project waaaaay back in mid-summer. We've been making baby steps ever since, but I think its most useful to talk about things in order (and, um, we haven't improved all that much, so maybe writing about it will help). At that time, I wasn't really working and Mark worked full time. Our schedules remain similar, but he comes home from school around 6 instead of work.

Meal planning and grocery planning is something I've been wanting to do for awhile. Mark and I eat most of our meals together, and it stresses.me.out. I'm not sure why it bothers me so much, but I think its because I thought this would be easy. It wasn't even something that it occured to me could be difficult or annoying. And we just cannot make it work. (I was really frustrated this summer. Probably something about too much time on my hands. I'm better now. Ish.)

On a sample day, I get home around 5 or so (I leave for work before7). Mark comes over usually after 6, by which time I'm hungry. And I'm trying not to eat something, because it should be dinner, but he wants to chat and relax and catch up. And I'm STARVING. After that, he wants to discuss several options for dinner. I no longer care, because I'm so hungry. I suggest one or two things, he doesn't like them, and we both end up annoyed (me more so, because I'm annoyed and famished). Mark genuinely likes cooking, but he isn't big on having a plan or scheduling. So its no big deal to him if he doesn't figure out what's for dinner til 7 and eat til 8:30. Part of this is laidback-ness, part is having a day that is altogether later than mine (my schedule is dictated by my workday, and I eat both other meals earlier than he does; I also eat a lot less).

I think I had in my head that you just figure out a plan and it comes together. Never did I think I would be totally miserable every night. Mark knows it bothers me, but he isn't sure what to do either. (This has actually been an issue since the worst-anniversary-week-ever*.) So he tells me he doesn't care, which is not true at all, just that he has no interest in dealing with it. He just isn't into almost every meal I come up with. The obvious remedy would be meal planning, but I'm so frustrated by the whole issue that I'm overwhelmed and don't know where to start. And Mark just wishes I could work it out and cheer up about it already. I'm too hungry to cheer up.

So I spent half my weekend reading everything Trent has ever written about food, and trying to come up with a plan. I heart Trent, so that was fun, but I was still a little lost. And Mark isn't always the best listener, so when he gets frustrated he mostly a) repeats himself and b) ignores whatever I'm saying. So he'll say "x" and I'll say "Agreed, thats a great point" to which he'll say "X" and I'll say, "Yeah, definitely, and what about Y?" And he'll say, "I really think x". Its a little frustrating.
I made out a list of the meals we needed and wrote down what we needed to buy (which sounds pathetically simple when I write it...but there are so many little decisions involved, it doesn't feel like it).

*Which I will tell you about sometime. It involves bad food, a work event and possible criminal charges.

Drawing the Line

On blogs like Get Rich Slowly, a common theme is better finances through making more money. You can improve your current situation at work by doing things like taking on new responsibilities, asking for a raise or getting a promotion. But the most common way to earn some extra money is to take on another job. Some people try home businesses, others get a part-time job outside the home.

I already have two side jobs: I tutor a high school sophomore in math and I work at Williams-Sonoma. I don't do either of them a whole lot, and I do them more for the change of pace than for the extra money. Teachers might not get paid that well, but it's a good deal better than Williams-Sonoma. I probably get (a lot) more benefit out of the discount than I do the salary.  While more money is always nice, I'm a lot more concerned with my quality of life and time for things outside of work than I am with making extra money.

The only debt I have is my mortgage and car (with only two payments left on it!). I always have enough left over for savings, I max out my retirement and my emergency fund is ready for anything. So I don't NEED need extra money.

Which brings us to yesterday...
I was getting ready to go home when my Assistant Principal asked if she could speak with me. We talked about an ongoing issue, and as I got up when the conversation ended, she asked me to wait. There was something else.

Our school has recieved a grant for forming a data team (a big trend in education right now). The team would analyze various data about our school, present it to the staff, and help inform decisions. And they want me to run it. It's not a surprising choice--I taught AP Statistics, so I probably have a better background (er, consisting of community college online Stats 101, but whatever) than anyone else, I've proven myself to be responsible, etc. It would be an interesting experience, we're likely to have the grant again next year, it would look good on my resume, and so on. I took some notes and she asked me to check in about it. I went to leave again.

And again she asked me to sit back down. There's another thing. How would I feel about being the programmer? (The programmer writes the master schedule for students and teachers and makes all the programs.) There are some immediate deadlines so they actually need to know about that one asap, as I (maybe? a real programmer?) am already behind. I got a copy of that calendar too, and we talked a little about what next year would look like. She assured me it wouldn't take me out of the classroom (which I don't want), but when I mentioned a reduction in load (teaching fewer classes, which would be nice) she said she'd push for me to get extra money instead. Except I don't want extra money. I want nights. And weekends. And summers, and that sort of thing.

I feel really ungrateful, but I'm feeling very pressured by these two opportunities. They're nice opportunities. They'd look good. But...they're a lot. I think something else would have to go. But what?!?!

I know there are teachers in my school who could really use the extra money from doing these things, and that I'm in a strong financial position. So its tough to say that I might not want that money; I might not want to do these things. Or rather, I do want to do them. They sound interesting, challenging, developing. But worth the money? I just don't know.

How much is your time worth to you?